I've shared this with you already but I thought I'd post it for your readers. =) Wrote this last year after I had my heart broken too. Btw racing here pertained to road racing
:
I’m trying to convince myself that loving is just like racing.
Sure, there are some races you join just for fun. There are also some you take seriously. For those, you have to race prepared. You have to train hard to be in the best form you can be. You have to give your body time to find its rhythm. Soon, you’ll learn to listen to it, know when it’s time to slow down or push harder.
With friends, you try to run or bike as much roads, hills and mountains as you can. You spend a lot of time and money on gear and equipment to help you perform well in races. I race my best when I know I have done all that I can to prepare for that particular race. When you don’t wish you spent more time training. When the night before the race, all you do is pray for you not to crash or get a flat tire.
There are some races I’ve joined where I knew I was doomed from the start. Sometimes my legs are just too heavy, or the pace of the peloton’s just too fast for me. But still I hang on until I get dropped.
There are also races where you feel you have such great, powerful legs. When you are always in the lead pack. When you can afford to pull and do your share in keeping the pace. When you find yourself enjoying the race so much you don’t want it to stop. When you know victory is in the bag. When the race is so intense and you are a key player. When your heart rate is insanely high, and you are too happy to be fit enough to keep it that way for a long time.
And then sometimes just a few kilometers to the finish, you focus on someone you think can lead you to the finish line. Then a group from behind breaks away and sprints to the finish. It’s too late for you to react and before you know it, the race is over. You lose.
Losing sucks especially if you had your heart and mind on winning. If you worked so hard on it, and nurtured it. If you wanted it so badly.
Despite the pain though, you don’t stop racing. You think about what went wrong so that next time you know better. You thank God that He has given you such a strong body, mind, heart and spirit to even participate in a race. You do not lose hope, and keep on praying that next time, it will be your race.
POSTSCRIPT: 3 months after i wrote that, I met the best man in the whole wide world, who is himself a triathlon superstar in Asia, and who is also on his way to becoming an Ironman champion.
Please don't completely swear off 18-24yo men!
All the best Wongstar! And don't worry about losing your #1 fan, you have thousands more out there.
